It's powerful stuff!
You may feel it calling to you, even though you haven't got a clue which creative outlet will let you shine your light.
When I finished my drama degree, I was obsessed with writing a play, only I didn't have a voice - I had NOTHING to say. I kept a folder with ideas in and the start of scripts but I never wrote more than 2 pages of any! I could think of situations and characters but not a story or what was going to happen, yet I still felt compelled to try. I started to question my intellect, telling myself stories that I was the least academic member of my family, that I was thick, that I was failing! I told myself that because spelling isn't my forte I couldn't write - yet I'm writing this right now, indeed writing is now surprisingly to me, a large part of what I do.
And yet, even though I was pretty horrible to myself in the inner voice department; that little spark of creative power didn't give up, it always shone through, the drive to make things and draw was always there - even at the hardest times.
Especially at the hardest times.
When it came to writing it was as if I was completely clogged up. My soul knew I had a voice in there but my ego put every obstacle in the way to prevent it from becoming a reality.
But allowing yourself to feel it and (even harder) do something about it is a big challenge for all of us.
Part of me, for a long time, didn't feel like it was really possible or that I truly deserved to allow myself to be happy doing something I love! Perhaps something bad would happen if I fully 100% indulged in what I truly needed to do?
What I needed to do turned out to be embracing myself and my creativity and not to apologise for it. I got to this realisation through returning to painting and less expectedly receiving coaching - by addressing a whole package of self care options. Taking back some control.
The unexpected 'Brucey Bonus' I got from allowing myself to try lots of creative pathways, was that I was reunited with myself because of my creative searching and my explorations outside my comfort zone - where all the good stuff happens! I grew to like, no LOVE and accept myself again. I don't want to dwell for too long on when I stopped liking and loving myself but it's important to say that I did.
But choosing a life as a creative isn't an easy choice, especially if you are ambitious and goal driven ( code for tough on yourself).
What I am coming to understand more and more is that it is in the ACT of making and creating where the JOY happens, it's in the PROCESS, nestled right in the middle of the DOING.
And that's why I feel so passionately about helping women reconnect with their creativity. It's one thing to crave a creative life or career (what are we really craving? A glamorous title? A fantasy that only exists for the few?) - but the reality can be tough, it's hard to make a living solely by being an artist or creative; it is possible but the reality is that you will probably need a part time job too - which is fine, but just factor that it, at least until you hit the big time!
Whilst a creative career isn't a certainty (I have days where I question my choice believe me) what is CERTAIN is that who ever we are, we all have access to beauty and creativity if we choose to EXPLORE, LEARN, WORK AT IT and ultimately GROW. And I believe it is GROWTH which is the ultimate reward.
Being creative is completely free and at the end of our fingertips. It's a gift.
Access isn't restricted to a select few, although it probably can feel that way.
This enrichment can then be applied to all areas of life. For example, I didn't know that the act of drawing an illustration after the birth of my daughter would lead me here where I'm embarking on training to do a coaching qualification.
CREATIVITY OPENS DOORWAYS
Art and creativity should enhance life, they shouldn't take away from it or make us sad. That's not its point.
It was during my MA in fine art that I became acutely aware that each one of us on the course was working through some personal issue. And that's because life and our creative impulses are so intertwined and connected, when we make art we tap into our true selves.
Your soul's purpose is shining through right now, even if you can't feel it. That's your power
If you want to find out more about reconnecting to your creative purpose then I would love you to join the creative conversation over on facebook in my group Create, Make & Shine ⭐️ xxx
©fionameakin 2017 fionameakin.com
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